Phoenix Lament
by MeriTrells
Summary: Fawkes' thoughts the night Dumbledore dies.


**Disclaimer: **As much as I'd liketo I don't own Harry Potter. Go figure.

**A.N. **Read, review, and (most importantly) enjoy.

I've heard you praised for many things, tolerance, acceptance, the ability to see people when the moon isn't full or without their ancestors affecting your view. For giving second chances and for understanding that our choices, not our abilities, make us who we are.

I've heard you called many things, senile, the greatest wizard of this age, wise, understanding, forgiving, accepting, intelligent, infallible...

When does a man become a myth? Pass on from the bonds of mortality into legend. That god-like state where he can do no wrong. And people forget that through it all you're still a man and men make mistakes.

People forget, you know. They forget that the first time you tried to make something fly you ended up setting your feather on fire and levitating your desk instead. They forget that it took you two months to sleep through a night when you started Hogwarts because you kept waking up homesick. That the summer after third year you blew up half the dining room in a fight between you and Aberfoth. That throughout all of your fifth year you couldn't look at Lyra without turning bright red and stuttering like mad. And she turned you down once you finally got the courage to ask her out. Turns out she was already dating Horace Slughorn, Apus Black, and a few others. Hardly anyone remembers the time You, Leo, Ara, and dear Meissa were caught out of bounds in the astronomy tower to celebrate Meissa's birthday; it was Leo's idea.

Ah, Leo Potter, the best friend one could ask for. Among mortals that is. Yes, he had been mortal, they'd all been. You hadn't thought about it at the time, just about playing pranks and not getting caught. But Leo had always had your back from the time you were caught with those restricted books to distracting Professor Dippet in potions so you could experiment. Which probably contributed to the removal of gillyweed and boomslang from the students' ingredients. Leo, with his weakness for red-heads and your ongoing joke about the Oedipus complex, slowly falling for Ara, constantly in trouble, second in every class, always trying to set you up with his sister Meissa.

Meissa. You would have married her. She was full of life, always laughing, and an eternal optimist. _Spes Ver Eternus_ Hope Springs Eternal. The Potter family motto and Meissa's way of life. She named me, remember? "Ignis! For fire, it makes sense but you can't name the poor thing Ignis. I think he looks like a Fawkes. Do you like that name, Fawkes?" No offense old friend but Ignis was a pretty bad name. But then you'd agree with me in a heartbeat, the only mistake Meissa made in your eyes was taking the Killing Curse for you. But now you're with her again, in some Hogwarts in the sky with no threat of anyone leaving before the others.

And I'm back here on Earth, cursed with life eternal. After every death I'm reborn with memories intact. It feels as if a part of me died with you. What did Ara say again, "Yes, it always feels like that. And there's a reason you know. Because when you truly love someone you give them a bit of yourself, emotionally speaking. Then when they die, that bit of you dies with them. Of course it works both ways; they give you a bit of themselves when they love you so when they die that bit of them lives on in you. That's why love is immortal." "_Immortalis Diligo_?" Ara smiled. "Of course. There's a reason we Lovegoods chose that as our motto." "You're going to be a Potter soon, what then?" "Well, let's see. Hope, Love, I'll have a girl and name her Faith." "You're crazy." But really she was one of the sanest people we've ever met. Say hello to her for me. To all of them. And have fun in your next great adventure old friend.

I'll miss you.

**A.N. **For those of you who didn't get it the O.C.s are Leo and Meissa Potter and Ara Lovegood. Ara and Leo were a couple, as were Meissa and Albus. There is a reference to Faith, Hope, and Love three of the greatest gifts according to the Bible. If it offends you I'm sorry but I'm pretty sure the Bible isn't the only place it's mentioned. The Mottos translate (hopefully) as Hope Springs Eternal and Immortal Lovers. They are Potter and Lovegood respectively (in my version of the H.P. world.) Now if you have time please review. Thanks!


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